My commitment to blog a gratitude post every day in May has slipped away over the last couple of days. The reason is because I have been having a crisis of faith.
When I started saying Thank You every day for something in my life, I began to wonder who I was saying Thank You to. Were the good things in my life a result of a blessing from some benevolent divine being, or were they just good luck? If my good fortunate was because of my hard work, was I saying Thank You to myself?
It seems easier to apportion the bad things to something — the chaos of the Universe rather than, say, the work of the Devil, or punishment for my sin. But the good things – where do they come from? Who is this person, or thing, or force, or energy field that blesses me?
I’m sorry, but I don’t have the answers. All I know is that I don’t believe in a judgemental God who keeps track on my good and bad deeds in some giant spreadsheet. I also don’t believe in the Law of Attraction – bad things happen to good people far too often for that philosophy to be true.
Maybe I believe in angels, not actual physical (or spiritual) beings perhaps, but that there are universal forces who keep my heart from being too battered. But when I think about the things I’ve had to endure, I’m no longer sure about that either.
And if there is someone or something handing out gifts, what have I done to deserve them? Does that mean if I fail to measure up, the gifts will be taken away?
My solution to this complicated problem is to step around it.
From now on I will celebrate the positive things in my life and I will recognise and name what love looks like in action. I will stand in awe of the brilliant, exciting, beautiful, inexplicable, glorious things in my life.
But I won’t give thanks, not until I can figure out who exactly I’m talking to.
Who do you thank for your good fortune? Does it make any difference if I’m thanking the wrong person?
2 thoughts on “Gratitude • Warning: May Raise Dangerous Questions”
Katie isn’t it about appreciating what is good.. not necessarily thanking any particular being (intrinsic or external God). It is your ability to appreciate what is good in your life not to support an ideal or faith. Bad things will always happen to good people and vice versa. But good things and opportunities also happen to good people.. too often people are caught up in the cycle where gratitude and appreciation are not core values and they fail to recognise when something good happens.
I also think gratitude is warranted for the not so good things in life.. because all that we experience teach us something and while we are learning then we are living. Need I say more…
Life is the biggest gift of all.
It is for that we should show gratitude.
“But I won’t give thanks, not until I can figure out who exactly I’m talking to.” … Hmmm..
Talk to numero uno.. yourself.. that works for me..
BTW… by something good I don’t mean massive in your face I won the lottery or I don’t have cancer type of stuff..
I mean all the little things.. the minutia of little things that colours your day..
A bird singing outside your window..
A loving glance from ‘the man’
A parking spot exactly where we want it (most people only notice when there isn’t one)
Waking up without aching joints… now that I would notice..
The way my dog regularly runs into where I am and looks up at me with big brown beautiful eyes and çhecks’ that I am ok… when I’m not she stays by my side until I am..
Yep..talking about all love again…
Comments are closed.