Self Portrait 365|92 • There is No Babysitter
Is it possible that I am the only one who has given up religion, or are other people tip-toeing around the issue the same way as I have?
Selfish Grief • Mourning the Loss of Myself
When I read about other people’s grief, I am ashamed. I cannot legitimately take my place among those who mourn the loss of someone they loved, someone who they miss every day and who they long to see again for just a few moments. My husband is dead, and the manner of his death was unnatural… Read More
The Self Portrait • a demonstration of self-acceptance
What if taking a self-portrait helped me accept who I am and what I look like?
The idea seemed feasible. Totally feasible but completely scary.
The Best Dinner in the History of the Universe Ever
I don’t normally take photos of food, but this was so exquisite and so beautiful I wanted to remember it forever.
Wounds and Scars • Yielding to the Darkness
Here are my wounds. Here are my scars. Body shame, shyness, anxiety, guilt, fear, hopelessness.
Will they ever be fixed? I don’t think so. Is darkness such a bad thing?
Monkey Magic • an Adventure in Malaysia
My boyfriend and I extended the long weekend into a mini city break and flew to Malaysia for four days. We stayed at the glorious Villa Samadhi, a traditionally inspired oasis in the centre of Kuala Lumpur.
The Pleasure Principle • Following Your Bliss
Somewhere along the way, pleasure has developed a bad reputation. According to the experts, only selfish people give in to their desires. I don’t agree.
Growing Old Disgracefully • Not Your Grandma’s Grey
Rather than believing that my best days are in the past, I am looking forward to middle age. I don’t subscribe to the notion that joy belongs only to the young — in fact, I’m beginning to think that youth is highly overrated.
Survivor Guilt
Why have I survived when there are so many others struggling with their pain? Why can’t I help them? Can I give away some of my happiness to someone else?
Are You Okay?
Are you okay?
I ask my boyfriend.
He frowns, knowing what the question means.
I’m not going to kill myself, he says.
World Suicide Prevention Day • For Those Left Behind
If one person dies globally from completing suicide every 40 seconds, and almost 80% of those people are men, there are many, many wives, girlfriends and partners left behind. This post is for those who are still here and have to live with the grief and trauma of knowing someone who chose to end their life.
Raise Your Hand • Not Waving, Drowning
They say we should ‘start a conversation’ about depression but sometimes it’s impossible to find the words. At *Not Waving Drowning* all you need to do is raise your hand and others will give you their time, their love and their support without you having to explain anything.
Attribution Bias • Why Where You Are is as Important as Who You Are
When I look back at my long marriage to a man who was emotionally damaged and took that damage out on me, I wonder why I stuck it out so long. I think of myself as intelligent, mature and courageous and yet all these character traits seemed absent within the four walls of our private lives. Allowing someone to abuse me for so long just doesn’t seem feasible given my personality.