On Thursday there was a pinching in my right hand side, deep between my stomach and my back. This was ovulation — I recognised it.
Not because it was on time — god knows my cycle is no longer reliable. My period comes early and it comes late. My hormones are telling me the end of my reproductive life is near. The ticking clock is about to stop.
What amazes me is this connection with my body. When I was dieting, I tried so hard to ignore the biological impulse of hunger that I blocked everything else out. Eventually, my hormones crashed and I no longer menstruated. My body and I were strangers.
Now, like the phases of the moon, I know where I am in my cycle and how it affects me. This is a gift and a pleasure.
On the weekend all my body wanted was the thrill of skin against skin, mouth against mouth, consumed with a longing to be filled up. But all too quickly the lush, sensual yearning of ovulation is beaten out by the downhill slide into PMT.
Today my breasts are tender, preparing for a period that could be my last. I cannot feel resentful, I’ll be sorry when it’s gone.
Oh the joy of connecting to this crazy, complex and magnificent body my soul inhabits.
Can you feel what your body is doing throughout the month? Does it amaze or distress you?
→ photo by ketrin1407