Figure out what you really want in less than two minutes

flowerWhat do you really want? What is the one thing that you don’t have now that you would like more than anything?

For some of you that question is easy to answer … for others you have no fucking idea.

I know a way to find out what you really want in less than two minutes. All you need is a pen and paper or somewhere to write on your computer.

Here’s what you do. You write twenty (20) — no more and no less — sentences starting with the words “I wish …”

You can write about deep desires or shallow wants. You can wish for impossible things or things that are just out of your reach. There are no rules.

Around about No. 10 you’ll start to get stuck. Don’t give in, just keep on going.

When you are done take a deep breath and get ready for the next part. You’ll have to look in the comments to see what to do next (to stop you cheating).

{photo source}

About KatieP

Embracing my midlife sexy while exploring modern love & relationships • Devoted to all things beautiful • Master of Arts in creative writing & non-fiction writing

54 thoughts on “Figure out what you really want in less than two minutes

  1. Now you have to be brutal. 10 things stay and 10 things go. You are only allowed to have half of the things on your list.

    When you have the top ten things, it’s time to get even tougher. Cut it in half again — these are your top five dreams. Are there any surprises?

    Tell me what your top five wishes are in the comments below. I’d love to see what you dream of. I might even let you in on mine.

    1. 1. I wish my memoir was published
      2. I wish I could earn my living doing what I love
      3. I wish I could always keep studying and learning
      4. I wish I had even more passion, (self) love and sex in my life
      5. I wish I could have more holidays on the beach

  2. I know this is serious and I’m not mocking you or the process but I’m feeling jovial.

    What about if you get “I wish for a packet of tim tams that never ends?”

  3. 1. I wish I wasn’t in pain all the time
    2. I wish I was loved (by a man)
    3. I wish I had more energy
    4. I wish I didn’t suffer from anxiety
    5. I wish my cousin Peter was still here

    Thanks. I loved that exercise. I had some crap on there I thought I really wanted…. but when it came to the crunch there were other things I wanted more.

    Geeez mine’s a bit fucking depressing isn’t it hahahaha

    1. My only question is — do you want things to be different that you have no control over?? That might be why it is depressing …
      Is there anything on your list that is under your control that you can change?

  4. OMG, Im doing this tonight, just what I need right now. In fact Ill do it whilst eating one of Shelley neverending tim tams…………Ill be back……

  5. 1. I wish I enjoyed playing with my kids
    2. I wish I was consistently sober
    3.I wish I owned a house in the country with a bedroom for everyone, a big kitchen and a big garden.
    4. I wish I loved to fall asleep with my husband
    5. I wish I could drive wherever I wanted without crippling anxiety

  6. Actuall scrub that – I want to change no 2 to…..

    2. I wish I could maintain a weight that was right for my body

  7. 1. I wish I was eating mindfully to honour my body
    2. I wish I felt energetic, vital and healthy
    3. I wish I felt balanced and calm
    4. I wish I could do Bikram yoga more often
    5. I wish I was happy with all that I had / was

    The list might look vastly different in a week’s time 🙁

  8. What a cool exercise! It made me feel much less overwhelmed with my life!

    I also wanted to thank you for your guidance the other night and let you know that I took the leap actually had my first session yesterday. It was a fluke that I got in that quickly with her, I was super lucky to get a cancelation. I think I was meant to be there. It was mostly intake but totally fabulous. The woman is wonderful and welcoming…I am so excited for next week : ) I truly feel like I am on my way….

  9. Great exercise!
    I wish:
    • I wish John would never have another seizure ever again
    • That a publishable story would just flow out of my brain to my finger tips
    • I could handle drinking like a normal person
    • I could travel more and fly first class each time
    • Australia and the US weren’t so far apart

  10. 1. I wish I owned a house.
    2. I wish I had more than enough money every month, and that I made it through my art.
    3. I wish I could travel wherever and whenever I wanted.
    4. I wish I had a book published.
    5. I wish I had a creative support group of friends in real life.

    Thanks for this. I was very surprised by what ended up staying on my list and what was cut. This was a great and very simple exercise.

  11. Told you I’d be back. This has been amazing for me Katie. It has brought all sorts of emotion forward – realization, sadness, happiness, gratefulness…….
    Thank you so much for this exercise, more people should do it.

    – I wish I could have my family near.
    – I wish I was one of ‘those’ mums naturally and it wasn’t such a hard slog to even just manage being a mum.
    – I wish I could run my own business.
    – I wish I had told my Grandad, before he died, exactly how great my childhood was because of him.
    – I wish I could respond better to/change the relationship with my daughter

  12. Please do hatch an idea Katie!!
    Just a follow up question, once we have our 5, do we look at what is within our control to go get, make happen, works towards?

    What about those out of our control? they made it to the top five from 20, they are importent but you can’t do anything about them? what then? any ideas……

    1. Tomorrow all will be revealed … (a hint ~ it’s not about your specific wish but what it represents at a deep core level – once you know that then you can be certain about what is right for you when you make any decision about what to do next).

  13. This was a really interesting exercise, even to see what made up my top 20, 10 and 5.

    My top 5 are:
    1. That I could do makeup full time
    2. That I could work in something that I am happy doing
    3. That I was 30 kilos lighter through exercise and diet being healthy
    4. I was able to enjoy life rather than being sad
    5. My block of land would sell for more than I paid for it

    First time I have been “brave” enough to put my thoughts out there.
    Love your blog 🙂

  14. Thanks for this, was feeling especially low on a Saturday night, missing my son (18) who recently left for the Marine Corps.;

    1. I wish Dave would come home (and stay home)
    2. I wish my dad wasnt sick with Cancer
    3. I wish I could trust people
    4. I wish my family were closer
    5. I wish for stability

  15. I just did this.

    1. I wish to live bravely, love without fear, and always to feel wings of grace near. (My favorite lyrics by Jewel.)
    2. I wish someone would pay me to read for a living.
    3. I wish I could visit and/or live in (at least for a year) Australia and Scotland.
    4. I wish to leave this world a better place than I found it.
    5. I wish to use my innate, God-given talents in the best ways I can and be the best me I can be.

    I’m a little surprised that two and three made the cut. I thought those were just small, never-going-to-happen dreams of mine.

    Thank you for this!

  16. 1. I wish I lived in a beautiful place that inspired me.
    2. I wish I had lots of really good, soulful friends.
    3. I wish I could live with more lightness and ease.
    4. I wish I could connect deeply with the right man.
    5. I wish I could have lots of exciting and interesting surprises in life.

  17. Hi Katie, this was a good exercise. My list had a lot of recurring themes. So I grouped them into categories and came up with this list that seemed to cover everything I want.

    I wish to be financially free to do what I love to do – to be free of financial bondage would be huge. I have struggled all my life with the lack of this.

    I wish to keep studying and learning — this keeps me from being bored. Its been said that boredom is the opposite of happiness.

    I wish to always have good health, strength, vitality and plenty of sex — I have always enjoyed good health for the most part but now I find myself at 54 getting fat and and not having the strength and vitality I had when I was younger. And I definitely need more sex, once or twice a week is not enough.

    I wish to always have my sweetheart, friends and family to love and be loved by — Been through lots of pain and sorrow with my previous marriage of 27 years. I am so blessed to have my wife DeeAnn now. I never knew how sweet love could be. We have been married just over two years and it truly is bliss. It seems that the old saying is true, “you have to know the bitter to know the sweet.”

    I wish to be around nature and beautiful things and create beautiful things – I just need the time and means to enjoy these things.

  18. 1. I wish I could spend my days doing art.
    2. I wish I could travel the country and the world in pilgrimage.
    3. I wish I could have a relationship with my romantic soulmate on the spiritual path.
    4. I wish I could have a teaching / coaching / spiritual direction practice.
    5. I wish I could live as a simple zen mystic.

  19. I wish I was a stronger, technically better dancer, who got paid for it
    I wish I was more relaxed and happier
    I wish I could be a better mummy and help my children be who they are not who they should be
    I wish I was more into sex
    I wish I knew who I was and where I’m going

  20. Hi Katie, how are you? Are you still doing this exercise? I just came upon it the other day as I’m going through a few things right now and trying to be more at ease with myself. Doing this exetcise was rather emotional for me as sometimes I just don’t get round to listening to myself and my deep inner thoughts. Life passes by so quickly and you do have to be brave to pause, listen and change direction if needed to get what you truly desire. I’m 36 now, running my own business and going through lots of personal change which is making me a litte unsteady. Thanks again for this idea and for your help. Best wishes from Ireland, Aoife

    This is what I came up with for my top 5:
    1) I wish to have a fun loving boyfriend(actually life partner) who enjoys every minute with me, who is interested in me and who loves me mind, body & soul-I wish to be always 100% at ease with this person and to be at peace.

    2) I wish to have a lovely family home-nice & warm, full of nice red colours, stylish but very homely & loving & welcoming-nice stove, plenty of natural light, beautiful view, triple or quadruple glazing!…

    3) I wish to have 3 gorgeous healthy little children-would really love that-I visualise abeautiful llittle girl with dark hair and a red coat! I wish to care extremely well for my children, to educate them, to expose them to good food, nourishment, love, joy & happiness

    4) I wish to have a successful business, to be good at what I do, to have enough money to employ people to manage my business and to give me time out when necessary. I wish to be at ease with my business affairs.

    5) I wish to always be fit & healthy-mind, body & soul, to be well nourished & to always care for myself & my family.

  21. Thank you Katie. So nice to see you still have it up & running along with all your useful tools. Thanks so much for your kindness & help. Hope all is well in Sydney. Best wishes, Aoife ♥♥

  22. 1) I wish I could travel more often
    2) I wish to find true love
    3) I wish I lived in a Mediterranean country, started a family in a big house, and had family dinners in the garden with my family and my husbands’
    4) I wish I could have a career in tourism branding and marketing
    5) I wish I could move from home for the second time, to have new experiences and meet new people

  23. I am so frustrated not able to find what I really want.I had gone through this process but no result.plz help me.

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