I know this secret, not because I’m some snake oil salesman with the latest potion to sell you and not because I’m trading on your insecurity about the way you look. I know this secret because I’m an expert in the field of weight loss. I’ve been a professional “loser” for six years.
I’ve been so heavy my thighs have rubbed together. I’ve been so light that my period stopped. But the most common weight I’ve been is gaining and losing the same five kilos over and over again.
But I don’t have to worry about my weight any more. I don’t crave croissants and chocolate. I can go all day without eating or eat all day and it makes no difference to the scales. My clothes always fit. My body is in proportion without odd lump and bumps. I don’t have a strict exercise regime and some days I don’t even do anything.
The secret is …
Your body wants to be five kilos heavier than what you think is your “happy” weight. And when you embrace it, rather than fighting it, the struggle will be over.
That’s it. Five kilos and self-love at that size is all it takes for your physical body to function at its optimum.
You will find that once you find this sweet spot, you will fit into clothes that fitted you when you were smaller. Here’s why.
The number where I used to think I looked perfect was 58kg. Being this lean took constant vigilance to my eating and 60-90 minutes a day of hard exercise. This behaviour could be sustained for short periods of time but the restriction and will power needed ran out pretty quick.
When this happened I put on around five kilos to sit at 63kgs. I didn’t look as good. I was carrying the extra kilos on my hips, thighs, and stomach. I had a small top half and a bigger bottom half. I knew that I’d never be able to sustain a 58kg body so I made 63kg my goal weight. But this heavier weight also took work to maintain. I still had to ‘watch what I ate’ and exercise three or four times a week. If I didn’t, my weight would creep up …
But now I’m around 68kg my body is the same as it was at 58kgs but just slightly bigger. The additional five kilos is in my top half and suddenly everything matches. My body likes it here and it stays here no matter what I do. There is no 1kg overnight gain from salt or carbs or alcohol, the scale only fluctuates by a few hundred grams. My hunger comes and goes without any fanfare. The cravings disappear completely. I am happy with healthy food the majority of the time and a few mouthfuls of my ‘treat’ foods satisfy me. My exercise regime is walking, or yoga or meditation. And I can still fit into the pants I wore when I was 63kgs.
This is the sweet spot.
So what if it only took five more kilos to find this peace? Five kilos that you welcome and enjoy because they give you bigger boobs and take the wrinkles from your face? Five kilos that allows you to end the battle?
The secret is that your mind wants to be leaner than your body does. Your mind is influenced by your past, impossible cultural standards and the lies of the weight loss industry whereas your body has only the wisdom of the Universe within its cells.
I’m listening to my body and loving the way it looks and how it makes me feel. I love my five kilos.
“Your mind is influenced by your past, impossible cultural standards and the lies of the weight loss industry whereas your body has only the wisdom of the Universe within its cells.”
Oh, I *love* that! Thanks for sharing the secret! 🙂
Thank YOU for connecting and leaving a comment 🙂
Aw shit! Now everyone knows ;).
Shit — I didn’t think of that, now no one will buy our books, e-courses and coaching service. Bummer 😉
yes!
you know, funny thing, 10lbs is what my body was so desperately needing too.
i woke up this AM and don’t really feel like working out, i havn’t had a day off from exercise in a while and my workouts have been “tired” but i am still doign them because i feel like i have to. i feel like if i don’t i will gain even more. until i logged on and read this i was having to fight the guilt of wanting to take the day off.
how did you conquer letting to in the exercise department – especially in the face of gaining a little? that is proving tough for me?
thank you for this post katie. i will not be working out today <3
http://www.shelleystark.com/the-voice-of-guilt/
Hope you don’t mind me butting in Katie.
At the time, I was hating going to the gym so I gave myself permission not too.
When all the crap started happening in my life, to be honest, I didn’t even think about exercising, it was hard enough to get up and get dressed.
Nowadays, I don’t want to ‘exercise’ I just want to move a bit more. I think when summer comes I’ll be swimming and walking more again.
LET IT GO was my saviour. I am no longer obsessed with food or weight and the kilos have come down slowly but surely. I am about 5 kilos heavier than my “BMI” number but I feel sexy and strong.
If I eat properly when I am hungry and exercise regularly for mental health, my weight will take care of itself.
You are SO right x
I’m deleting the Facebook plugin which means I’ll lose the comments I had. I’m copying Shar’s here so it is not lost.
She said :
Having released alot recently I was contemplating this very thing the last week or so.
I had a ‘number’ that I used to live by but have been focused throughout my release this time that I will not live by that anymore and that my ‘sweet spot’ may have changed.
Sure enough I find myself in clothes now that I used to be alot ‘lighter’ when I wore them previously.
Also my shape has changed.
And I said : Sounds like you are doing so well. Good on you x
I found you through pinterest. I have been sitting and reading for about an hour now. I have a history of ED, although have been “well” for 21years. Wow. A very difficult event 13 years ago swung me off balance and my mind has played a lot of games during these years. I’ve also put on around 25 lb (11 kilo) which has reinforced my obsessive thinking issues. My original recovery was due largely to Geneen. Roth’s books which I’ve re-read in recent years. I have been hovering in this strange “not sick/not quite right” place for these 13 years. Your writing is no nonsense, powerful, true, and entertaining. I love what you say about the self love movement. This has been nagging at me also, it’s so great to read someone’s intelligent, insightful thoughts on the same. Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you for your courage and wisdom.
Hello Joyce — so lovely to meet you.
Thank you for sharing your ED recovery story and for your kind words. You made my day x