8 Sure-Fire Ways to Destroy Your Relationship is written by Benjamin Ritter, personal and executive consultant.
No matter how many times you fall in love, there’s nothing worse than feeling that you caused the destruction of your own relationship. One of the best ways to minimize these feelings is to know that you did everything you could to make it work.
Avoid the following eight sure-fire ways to destroy your relationship. They won’t fix the loss of a relationship, but they will give you some peace of mind that you did what you could to make it work.
The eight sure-fire ways to destroy your relationship
1. Losing independence
Relying on your significant other for your entire emotional, physical and social needs will leave you consistently disappointed, and place a significant amount of undeserved stress on him. To help avoid losing independence in a relationship, keep your previous social circle, as well as continue to meet new people who would complement your life.
2. Forgetting your interests
People in a relationship tend to put their other interests on hold because they feel fulfilled with just their partner. Eventually, they may become resentful that their relationship is getting in the way of their (remembered) interests. Also, if people forget their earlier interests completely, they lose a large part of what made them attractive to their significant other.
3. Discussing the future too often
Society has raised us to believe that relationships must be serious, so it’s natural to think about the future, casting your partner in the role of husband/wife or father/mother. Voicing those ideas and feelings too soon can lead to arguments, insecurities, and distancing. Nothing good can come from rushing a relationship.
4. Turning it into a friendship
Your relationship is unique because of the level of sexuality, sensuality, and intimacy that it involves. You won’t have a relationship anymore if you take those away. Remember why you started dating in the first place, and keep those aspects of the relationship alive.
5. Holding grudges
A majority of your relationship issues are ongoing problems that cannot be solved. If you aren’t going to end the relationship, then you need to learn how to deal with your frustrations and negativity in a more positive way or risk causing long-term damage to the relationship.
6. Being overbearing, controlling and jealous
Unfairly restricting your significant other, and treating them as a possession, can cause resentment and cause them to become distant, argumentative, and secretly “back on the market.” Learn to trust, and respect the life your partner is living in the relationship.
7. Not displaying commitment/signs of importance
Both partners in a relationship need to feel important and appreciated. The fear of losing the one you love can actually end a relationship. Signs of excitement, interest, and inclusions into your life (hobbies, interests, family, etc.) can give your partner the comfort s/he needs to feel that s/he will not be abandoned.
No matter how big or small, one lie will plant the seed of doubt that will destroy your relationship. Be honest, open, and if there’s something you really don’t want to say, tell your significant other that they probably don’t want to know.
Relationships will end for a variety of reasons, some within your control and some not. The previous eight sure-fire ways to destroy your relationship are within your control, and if you can make sure to avoid them, your relationship has a much greater chance of working out.