Self Portrait 365|38

katiepaul-atwar

At War

Today I am not fond of my face, my hair or my body. I have a headache, my dodgy shoulder is playing up and I have a UTI that feels as though I’m pissing razor blades. It seems unfair that when I finally get to a place where I’m okay with who I am, my body decides to betray me.

I do all the woo-woo stuff — positive affirmations, EFT, searching my psyche for wounds that need healing and none of it works. I wonder what I’m doing wrong … I wish I knew.

So here I am with my warpaint on — fighting myself while knowing that even if I win, I still lose. I guess the only path is acceptance. To be honest, I don’t have any other choice.

 For after all, the best thing one can do when it is raining is let it rain.
― Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

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Technical Information

Camera model: Canon EOS 7D
F/stop: f/1.4
Exposure time: 1/100 sec
ISO speed: ISO-125
Focal length: 50mm
Post processing: Photoshop Elements
Filters: Adjust saturation | Diffuse Glow | Adjust levels
Overlay : French Kiss Collection Textures Arroyo
Blending Mode: Multiply 22%

 

About KatieP

Embracing my midlife sexy while exploring modern love & relationships • Devoted to all things beautiful • Master of Arts in creative writing & non-fiction writing • Join the hottest group on FB → Sassy Ageless Women

7 thoughts on “Self Portrait 365|38

  1. Something about some people who walk through the rain but others who somehow get wet. I wish I could remember but my thoughts are scattered.

    At least you have war paint and determination.

    I hope you feel better soon.

  2. Ah, Katie. I can relate! I think all we can do is take it a day at at time. That’s what worked for me when I was diagnosed with a chronic illness.

    Lizzi, I believe it was Bob Marley who said that quote.

    1. Yes, I console myself with the thought that tomorrow will be better (and if not tomorrow then maybe the day after). Sorry to hear of your ongoing struggle 🙁

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