In 1957 Carl Jung wrote in the The Undiscovered Self that nothing is as strange as man who from the ground-plan of his unconscious mind has the ability to think conscious minded. This dissociation between the conscious and unconscious mind is responsible for psychic disturbances and difficulties that arise in one’s life.
All problems are created because of the separation between the logic of the conscious mind and reality itself. As we attach labels to reality, trying to explain it consciously (which is the function of the conscious mind) we start associating with those labels in spite of the experience itself.
Let’s say you are working in an environment you are not happy in. You would like to be better paid or your passion is somewhere else but your conscious mind kicks in with all the reasons why you should be happy in your current situation. You come up with a list of reasons, and they are all good reasons, but they are just reasons.
At the same time, that part of you that wants something different is unhappy. The unconscious mind says “I wish I could do something else, I wish I could do something that I really like.” So every day you go to work and you lose just a little piece of your aliveness. But your conscious mind continues to talk you into it. You associate more with why you should be happy rather than how you really feel.
The conscious mind comes up with lots of reasons to be happy, but it still doesn’t feel right. That is a misalignment between the conscious and the unconscious mind. You know consciously that everything should be OK, but emotionally, physically and spiritually everything is not OK.
Maybe “I’ve never been true to myself” means “I’ve never been true to my unconscious mind”.