You know your heart is broken. You live with the pain everyday. It is that relentless ache in your chest and that empty feeling in your belly that won’t go away. You’ve felt it before – when someone you loved betrayed you – but this time your heart is broken because you feel you are the one who has betrayed you.
It’s how you look.
You’ve worked so hard to have the body of a fitness model, the size clothes that society tells us is sexy and attractive, but it keeps slipping away from you. You get to your ‘happy’ weight and then life gets in the way and the kilos come back. Your life seems to be all about that number on the scale.
Every meal is a battle that defines if you have a good day or a bad day. Not fitting into your favourite jeans makes you teary. Some mornings you wake with swollen eyes, fingers and ankles and you know why.
Tomorrow is that day that you will finally pull yourself together and get back on track but these days it always seems too hard. You are so hungry and tired that you can’t even think straight any more.
I’m here for you. I’m not here for the women who are content to gain and lose the same weight year after year and think it is just what you have to do to stay in shape. I’m here for the broken hearted.
I’m here to tell you that there is another way. For the broken hearted, dieting doesn’t work. You have to give up the fight once and for all.
And when you stop going in to battle with yourself, you will find an amazing peace and contentment with who you are. You might end up looking different to what you always imagined, but it won’t matter. The highs and lows of a fully experienced life will not send you running to food for comfort, or distracting yourself with restriction, they will just be the shit that happens.
One day, I promise, you will forget to eat, you will choose to make love rather than going to the gym, you will love your curves, and you will radiate aliveness from the inside. Visible ribs and protruding hip bones on other people will cease to make you envious, it won’t even matter. You will remember that a size 12 is not fat (and DD boobs are a blessing).
You can start today. Refuse to ever diet again and saddle up for the roller coaster ride of your life.
Unleash your unique self and tell the world to go and get fucked.
It works. I’m proof.
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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you, Katie ♥♥♥
God bless you for this post. Thank you…more than you will ever know. I am in the U.S….sitting up at 3:48 AM…crying. Gentleman I’ve been dating for a month just held me in his arms 3 hours ago, and told me, that nothing physical would ever happen with us, because he couldn’t get past my weight. I am too fat. (He has just lost 50 lbs on Atkins diet; I have lost 100 lbs since November 2009 – in just 10 months and still have 60 lbs to go for my goal). I am in shock. But…but…I know I am not the one who is fucked up. Just having a hard time helping my heart remember that right now. And then your post came through on my email few moments ago…God bless you, thank you. With all my heart.
Oh Lynne I am so sorry. I wish I could take you in my arms and tell you how beautiful, amazing and awesome you are. Listen to your breaking heart, feel the sorrow and know that you more than perfect right now. Continue to give love and you will find the one who will be man enough to appreciate your infinite beauty. x
Thank you so very much, Katie…I am feeling your hugs from all the way across this wide world. Please don’t ever doubt the power that your words have…to bring healing, health, help, and most importantly, hope. You and your beautiful heart and posts and wisdom are blessings to us all. Always remember that. When you write, just know that there are friends out here in the internet universe that need the message that you are bringing…right at that very moment. More so than you may even know. Best and brightest blessings to you, always…and thank you.
This is timely for me too Katie as I just decided recently to not diet any more and go back to the way I used to eat, when I never thought about it. When I was a healthy weight ‘naturally’. When food was NEVER an issue. So that’s where I’m going. The way I like to eat, semi-vegetarian, low fat, heaps of nice carbs..mmmmm. That’s how I ate for most of my adult life and never, ever had weight issues. Wanting to look like a fitness model started me on the downward spiral (and upward on the scales) because I changed my normal eating habits. What was I thinking???. I’ll train because I love to but won’t beat myself up if I miss a few sessions. Balance WILL be restored.
Thanks! xxx
I LOVE this!! Thanks
Thank you Katie; I’ve been doing exactly what you describe here for about a month now; yes, my favorite black skirt is a little more snug, but I feel great, and I no longer beat myself up when I don’t have a “perfect” day, because I’m slowly learning that none of us are perfect and if we were what a boring life that would be. I’m choosing instead to really – and finally – embrace my life and “live” it rather than deprive myself any longer; thank you again for this wonderful post! You are so INSPIRING and you write beautifully; thank you!
Thanks Dude..
PS my new Phatness blog will NOT be a ‘trigger’ blog for you so pop by any time! I’m over all that. I’m over lists, and macros and plans. Thanks for your part in that!