The pain that I cause exhausts me
There is no relief in the light
The darkness beckons with its lure of a different kind of pain
Red
Raw
Jagged around the edges
Blackened blood congealed around wounds
Self inflicted harm
Bingeing on food now seems inadequate
The siren song of oblivion is sung by different players now
I stand watching the destruction
Unable to resist the promise of silence
The screaming in my head muted by the extremes of sensation
In the midst of a tsunami
I inhale the chaos
Reminded that this too shall pass